Alpha Adventurer Pillows

'Where it asks, 'head of household'. . . who is it. . . you or Marmaduke?'

'Okay, alpha doggie, go delegate someone to fetch.'

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

The Life of Pi

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

A is for App...B is for Blogger...C is for Celebrity.

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

'What begins with 'E'? Well, 'Everything'!'

Astral Projection

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Needs to get a life"

A surprise in heaven

"I do tech support for the cloud."

"...Ooh, I wanna know more about your dark side!"

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Saint Peter will sometimes put on a disguise just to play a prank on the new arrivals.

I used to love coming here. Nudist beach.

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

Halo Frisbee.

Otto the SmartyCar!

'This is way better than a litter box.'

'It won't do you any good! You can't run from your math problems!'

"I'm pretty sure my self-driving car is moonlighting for Uber behind my back."

"Trust me, I'm a robot."

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

"That's Bob. He's a bit of a wing nut."

"I told you to pack a damned sweater."

Free ticket to heaven... details inside

"Your long-range investments would have made you a very wealthy man."

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

'Let me guess - you lost a fight against a young challenger who has now replaced you as the company's alpha male!'