Allowance Adventurers Pillows

'I'm the only kid on the block whose parents deduct a 'management fee' from his allowance.'

"It's true: no more burpees."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

"Needs to get a life"

A surprise in heaven

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

Saint Peter will sometimes put on a disguise just to play a prank on the new arrivals.

Halo Frisbee.

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

'My allowance isn't much - but I have a great benefits package!'

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

"I told you to pack a damned sweater."

Free ticket to heaven... details inside

"Your long-range investments would have made you a very wealthy man."

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

"Even if I did believe that he was communicating through you. I'm afraid it's too late to change the will now."

2pm meet your Creator

'Why can't we go on a field trip to heaven?

"Let's say an immediate $10.00 allowance increase plus an annual 8% cost of living raise and I'll call him off."

'He doesn't talk to me anymore.'

'We're the Meeks and we're here to see about our inheritance of the Earth.'

"Spent the first five years in Hell. I didn't sell my soul, I leased it."

St Peter: 'The bike can stay. You, on the other hand, aren't on the list.'

'I need enough for popcorn and a movie.'