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"Hold that thought. I have to go take a number five."

'Oh, this is just great... Now how am I going to get a Wi-Fi connection?'

"He says it's not an invasion - it's a cruise."

Aliens fish for a man who is fishing.

"Cower before me, earthlings! Your bombs have failed, we have killed many of you, less of you remain to fight..."

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

'I assume you have documentation to back up these 27 light-years of business travel.'

How life on Earth really got its start.

"I just don't think a giant flaming blob of alien ectoplasm would say that."

'Without a green card, many super heroes from distant planets end up fighting grime.'

'Hi - We hear that you people just LOVE diversity'

'And tonight our pundits will be debating the issue, 'do extra terrestrials exist?'

'This is my new friend Roger - he's a real down-to-earth kind of guy.'

'Now, don't make a big fuss -- we're just migrant workers.'

"And yet another headache for the Immigration and Naturalization Service!"

"Man, they can't do anything right. Half the countries are underdeveloped. The other half are overdeveloped."

'We'd like to talk to you about the kingdom of God...'

'We need to discuss your ultrasound.'

'Will the results of this probe be sent to my gastroenterologist?'

'I'm an out-of-network provider."

'I think he wants you to pull his finger Mr President'

'Hi. We're economic refugees ? take us to your welfare department.'

'We're beyond globalization. We'd like to present a case for universalization.'

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

A teacher introduces the new student to the class - he's an alien - 'Good evening class, this is Zork and he will be joining us until he learns enough English to conquer the Earth...'

"It's seven billion life forms talking about themselves."

'I appreciate the concept of universal health care, but there are limits.'

'Of course we speak English, Its the language of choice for species bent on galactic domination.'

"I live in Atlanta, but I think you meant where am I from originally."

"Nessie's been abducted by aliens."

'Clever UFO camouflage - they know we won't report a flying pig.'

'Something went terribly wrong between design and development.'

"I thought you said there was intelligent life on Earth? Their communication hasn't progressed beyond basic symbols."

Nigel's ability to find new markets made him the envy of all the other IT sellers.

"Be prepared to encounter cultural references that we're just not going to get."