Ageism Antagonist T-Shirts

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

A man sprays his bald head with "Spray Hair" to make it seem as thought he has hair.

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

Breast Height Chart

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

"Where do you remember last seeing your glasses?"

Aging Support Group

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

"You're right, they are statins."

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

"In your 40s, hair starts growing everywhere except where it should."

"I enjoy being old - my health always gives me something to talk about!"

Baldness Facts

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

Sir Isaac Newton Sucks!

Warning: Contents may settle over time.

"You don't have OCD or ADD. You have OLD."

"I know I'm getting old when one big fart throws my back out."

'Admit it, George-you're too old to chase after does.'

"It's my 39th birthday, and I'm not dealing with it well. What's wrong with me?"

"What do you mean, 'I'm in good shape for a man of forty'? I'm only twenty-six!"

Potts is having a job keeping up with the young turks.

'Try not to stare. Father Time hot hair plugs and botox.'

Middle Age Spread.

"It's male pattern osteoporosis."

'Ageism at work'

I'm not sure when I can help you. It's not easy getting parts for you anymore

"She just uses all that make-up to hide her age."

"Botox? No, I simply stopped smiling when I turned 30."

The Leap of Faith Taken by Alzheimer's Caregivers