Aged Adventurer T-Shirts

"You look good for your age."

"Well sure, I forget things... doesn't everybody?"

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

Albert & Myra - The End Story

"One year closer to college!"

Inside One's Memory Bank

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

'Unfortunately, there's no cure. It's called growing older.'

Duel in a wheelchair.

You're never too old for ballet!

"Went with the hair plugs I see."

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

'I can't believe I'm pretending to be 55 already...'

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'

'Hi, I'm middle-age and I'll be hanging around a while.'

'Is that all you can do Just sitting there watching your old movies'

"From Zero To Sixty In What Seems Like Eight Seconds Flat."

You know you're getting older: when your back goes out more often than you do!

Wally's dye job...makes his hair look 25 years younger.

The Great Pyramid of Geezers

'It makes you look fifty years younger.'

'I have to be honest with you. I've been taking anti-aging nutrients for years. I'm 93 years old.'

Altar Ego

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

"Don't kid yourself. Harold, you're no spring chicken!"

Women

"Ha! Now no one can call me 'old'! I just overtook a sports car!"

'This is as close to a round up I'll ever get.'

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."