After Work Drinks Gifts

"Held up at work? You could have called."

Professional woman in pub

"Could I have a Tommy Tippee cup for my friend's beer, as he's been using a concrete breaker all day."

Reminder from my Telebartender. Gotta go!

"My boss said I have narcolepsy. She could have waited to tell me after I woke up."

"I know . . . your job's a pressure cooker. So will tonight be natural or quick release?"

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

'What's the smallest budget you can manage on?' 'The most you can give me!'

'Yo-you Ma will now raise our spirits and assuage our pain.'

'You're hopeful - worrying about what underwear to wear for the office party!'

"I'm trying to lure in Generation X-ers. They're the new sandwich generation. They're sandwiched between caring for their kids and caring for their parents. So they drink lots and lots of coffee."

'Hey, everyone! I think I found the bottleneck!'

Determined not to make a fool of himself Mitch keeps practicing every dance move for the Annual Office Christmas Party!

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

'Here, we don't need a retirement plan. If you do your job as we want it, you'll directly go from your desk to hell.'

The paperless office sign covered in post-it notes

'Absent friends!'

Bureaucracy gone mad!

Worried man looking at stock market chart on his computer screen with office party going on in the background.

'When you said I would go places with the firm , sir, I was rather hoping for more than the annual outings...'

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

'Leave my biscuit in my in-tray. I'll deal with it in the morning.'

"Where do you see yourself in five pints time?"

'Mr. Smithdon's at his desk, but he's not really there....He's somewhere out there in cyberspace!'

"Not the most impressive strategic plan I've ever seen."

"This is our new head of conflict resolution."

"In an effort to make this a more pleasant meeting, I have taken the liberty of rotating our sales figures chart counter-clockwise a full ninety degrees."

"I told my manager that I couldn't cope with the endless mind numbing paperwork. I said I'd had enough of the bureaucracy, that I had to get out."

'One businessman's lunch-on-the-rocks and one businessman's special straight-up.'

'Try one...they're miniature annual reports.'

"Oops! Wrong plug."

When he was between Executive Assistants, filing became a challenge for Jonathan.

If found, please return to cubicle L-325.

Big Talk/Small Talk.

Corporate Punishment.