Aerophobics Gifts

"Here we are."

"Emergency exits are located on both sides of the cabin...."

'What's our stockbroker doing in the shower? Quick! Run and get me a rolled up copy of the Wall Street Journal!'

Little Miss Muffet's Graduation.

'Bernice . . . could you come in here please? Bring a can of hairspray and a cigarette lighter!'

Speaker Farmer.

Terminal Illness.

Gramophone Headphone

"Just so you know, if this elevator breaks down, I have no problem cannibalizing your body for my survival."

'What it like being able to jump so high?'

'My mother is a black widow, my wife is a black widow...'

"I like to come out here and watch planes sit on the tarmac for hours, then see everyone get kicked off and rebooked for tomorrow."

'Now that we've boarded our first class, priority, gold priority, business class, premium and gold star passengers - is there anyone else left?'

R. Wickert: Born at Home, Died at Home, Home Schooled. . .

Arachnophobia training.

Music Makes Your Head Spin.

After being frightened away too many times, Miss Muffett decided to rif herself of the spider.

Agoraphobic's shrine

Statue of Liberty reads Hifi Choice magazine.

People Who Love Teleworking

Shipwreaked man rejecting desert island because of a spider

Up, Down, Plummet (waiting for elevator)

"I would get baptized, but I have a strange fear of water."

"I was afraid to fly when I was mortal, and I'm afraid to fly now."

Overcoming Your Fear of Heights.

How long have you had this fear of heights?

"Is that the Earth?"

Ever since he was a little magazine, he had been deathly afraid of spiders, and he didn't like where this was going,

'Darn! Restless Leg Syndrome!'

'These overtired Pilots you hear about I suppose.'

Fear of flying economy class.

A fortune is uncomfortable outside of its cookie

'Gah! Spider!' - 'Arghhh!' - 'Oh, hello insomnia.'

"What do you recommend for someone who's terrified of flying?"

Dicky's fear of water made him something of a social outcast.