Adolescent Child Pillows

"Son, it's about this calculator we've found in your satchel."

"Leda, honey, let's not keep your date waiting!"

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Well, young man... just consider yourself grounded!"

The day the cat realized it was dependent.

"May we live in interesting times. And may we outlive them."

It's a radical new development, a text novel for the text generation

"We’ve nailed guitar-solo-face. Time to try playing instruments."

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

'Are we broke yet?'

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"I don't know why I worry...Baldo's just a normal boy. It's good to see him maturing...making friends...with nice girls...exploring new feelings...and desires.... You have to go home now."

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

'Since we're being so honest, perhaps I should mention that I liked you better as an egg.'

"I don't need a lecture Dad, I know all I need to know from the online tutorials of @DamKing61, @HotDam72 and @DamEasy27. . ."

Peter

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

'I'm not doing well in Chemistry - I'm out of my element.'

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

"Could you please downgrade this to a C? High expectations bring out the worst in my parents."

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

"Your mother and I think it's time you got a place of your own. We'd like a little time alone before we die."