Actor In Training T-Shirts

"There's a big difference between being a method actor and a meth OD'd actor, Burt."

"Just be yourself."

'They all want to play the star.'

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

Rap music

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

'The good teen-age mime chooses to study for an exam, while the bad one chooses to steal hubcaps.'

Super Student

Yo! Emmett Kelly raps! (with ringmaster flash)

'We'll send you to acting class when you're older. For now, get up and get ready for school.'

"I can't tell you how it ended. That would ruin the sequel."

Mu-ther!! Pu-lease! I already have cleaned my room. I vant to be left alone! So when are the drama club auditions? Everyday.

'I've got a cape. I think I can make it.'

"Simon, I'm not really interested in your juvenilia."

"Have a career, and then if you want to try acting, you'll have my blessing."

'It's called a 'hat' -- you tip it to women instead of hitting them over the head with a club.'

To Be/Not To Be

'It's not for acting...It's for a testimony in a courtroom.'

"And here - take this Vin Diesel monologue with you!"

"My report on summer vacation. . . Book and movie rights are available for $1000 each."

"When I grow up, I want to be a Presidential impersonator on 'Saturday Night Live.'"

'Good lick with your future acting career. And just to give you an idea of how tough it is out there, here's a copy of 'Withnail and I'. The uncut version.'

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

"… and once you've finished advanced infantry training, you'll be assigned to film school."

A panhandler with a sign that reads "I'll never work in this town again!".

"The quality of the writing is an embarrassment, it has no style, no fluency, no soul!"

"I like you kid, but you're really just a work in progress!"

Waiting to be discovered, or taken to work, whichever comes first...

Pantomime auditions - 'He'd be ideal as Buttons.'...'Oh, no he wouldn't.'...'Oh, yes he would!'

"Out! Damned Spot!"

Gertie's never been the same since she got the cape

I'm just waiting tables until I can make it as an actor

"Larry and Phil aren't sure what they want to do, but Michael is interested in show business."