Academic Coach Mugs

"It's your job to work hard and get good grades, David. It's my job to make your mother laugh."

"At this school we stress critical thinking. And right now I'm very critical of your thinking."

"I had to admit to my teacher that you helped me with my homework... She was about to put me in a 'special needs' class!"

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Ethics exam cheater.

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

Albania and North Macedonia: entrance denied

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

Others will fight for you

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Reach for the Star.

Eternal Student.

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

Pretty Flowers

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'