Abstract Obsessor Gifts

Invisible throng murmuring appreciation of invisible art at London's Hayward Gallery.

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

bird interprets modern art

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

'I don't care if Jackson Pollock did start out this way. We are drawing kittens.'

Lots of famous art may have been inspired by taxes. Jackson Pollack's "Number 5" could be a visual representation of global regulations. And perhaps Rodin's "The Thinker" is a man trying to understand those rules. Maybe Roy Lichtenstein's "Ohhh ... Alright ..." shows a woman being told to continue holding to get her tax question answered. And they there's Edvard Munch's "The Scream" ... Nothing makes you feel like that more than preparing a tax return!

Surreal ale

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

'Wait, this isn't Monet's garden, it's Mondrian's.'

I painted them all from memory.

Jackson Pollock Signs A Rent Check

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."

"Definitive." "Compelling." "Persuasive." "Upside down."

Jackson Pollock as a child

The neighbors were not sure what to think of the young Picasso's snowman

Prisoner still life painting.

'Don't know much about art but I know what I like.'

"I like it, Julian — it speaks to what a waste of time and money your MFA was."

"It's a great work!"

"He's left out the staples"

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

'Picasso'

"He had the Guggenheim in mind, I think."

What do you think? I'm calling it Snow.

"Here the artist opted for a more impressionistic approach, because drawing a tree is hard."

Giacometti's less famous 'Man Walking Dog'

Metropolitan Art Center current exhibit: Father of the Finger-In-Your-Eye School of Modern Art.

Jackson Pollock's brief career with the highway department

"I like his style. He makes it look like an accident."

Cover story: Picasso

'Sorry, but I think your Mondrian tattoo was a mistake.'

Bobby eight year old