Abstract Appreciator T-Shirts

"I don't know a damn thing about art, but my back hasn't felt this good in years."

"I think you have something to say, all right, but I don't think you're saying it."

Abstract Expressionism: You'll hate at least one.

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

Madonna of the Pukes.

Trump! The Musical

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

"We have an acronym!"

Night of the Zombonies.

Pastorius wonders why.

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

Meat Grinder

bird interprets modern art

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

'They're still following me?! Oh geez, what if they're in some sort of gang or something?'

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

Final words on gravestones.

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

Jackson Pollock Signs A Rent Check

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"Darling, do you ever worry that we're becoming some sort of Merchant-Ivory production?"

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

Lot for people who don't know how to park.

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

'Thank goodness he's gone through sensitivity training.'

"My kid could do that."

Prisoner still life painting.