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Banting in the Yeomanry

Lifesaver!

Top Ten New Year's Resolutions

'I said, you're supposed to be in the underworld.'

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

Veterans Day US

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

Commando crashes into wall, instead of through window.

People with pet dogs in a dog park with workout equipment for dogs.

Submariners' Eye Test.

'Ooh girl, he may look like a potato, but he moves like a yam!'

"Nice going, Larry. They're going in after your liverwurst and sardine sandwich that fell behind the fridge last month."

Kathleen felt she was stuck between Iraq and a heart place.

"I told you to slow down."

Small Ads. For Sale :- 'Navy Pram'.

5. Install all equipment carefully. 6. Never increase the weight load of any exercise machine when you are by yourself.

'My doctor tells me I have medal poisoning.'

1. Wealthy people will consider hiring others to do their exercise for them. They should not give in to this temptation, as studies have shown that this seriously slows down any truly serious body-building campaign. 2. The key word in isometrics is balance. Be sure every part of your body shares in the fun equally and you will be able to avoid awkward developments.

"She's sinking alright, Captain. Even the rats are wearing life jackets!"

"It's a great extra recruiting tool. Those who know they can't live up to that quickly disappear."

"He wants to be a Navy Seal when he grows up."

"They're flight attendants."

'I thought about leaving once, but I couldn't quit the habit.'

'So what do you do?'

The captain had longe suspected the impending mutiny. But from who?

"You weren't kidding, those are just tiny pictures of your grandkids!"

What're you doing for Thanksgiving, little buddy? Having a huge party. It'll be full of turkey, cranberry sauce, wine, eggnog, football, and friends and family who love me dearly. Oh, good. I was afraid you'd be alone all day playing video games. "Turkey Slaughter VI" is no ordinary game. You're coming to my place.

Target practice

"Your sailing skills are improving but you need more work on the 'drop anchor' part."

'I'm inquiring about the damage control position.'

'We have a phone for the Navy -- an aye phone.'

"Aye, Cap'n. He's handsome. But I'm fairly certain the manual says 'parrot.' Not 'ferret.'" "Arrgh. Shut yer yap and fetch me some rum."

Male Green Beret applying face camouflage - female Green Beret applying lipstick.

"I didn't see you at camouflage practice today, soldier!"

Santa Works Out