Workaholic's Weekend Nightmare Gifts

"Excuse me, this is the work table."

Please sit down. I can give you five minutes.

"Look, I'm dying. Gotta go."

"Don't open me, you fool!"

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

"We're looking for a workaholic with another job that'll provide the pension and health benefits we don't provide."

"Sounds like you've got a great vacation planned...with plenty of down-time for the conference calls I'm planning."

"Stress is often associated with feelings of 'isolation'...It's really important that you see yourself as valued, as useful!"

'This new 4570mhz system with super high-speed dsl internet connection will allow you to work 50% harder and I'll be able to keep in touch with you from my yacht.'

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

"You'll be allowed to work from home two days a week... Saturday and Sunday."

"We have a clear work/life policy. . . If you have a life, you get more work."

"I don't think I'll go in today. I just dreamed a whole day's work, including lunch."

"I'm sorry Perkins, but dying at your desk is a strict breach of company policy!"

'Sixty percent of my income is from newspaper delivery, 20% from odd jobs, and 20% from allowance.'

'When I ask what our inventory is 'What ever' is not an acceptable answer.'

"We still encourage working from home, but on weekends."

'You must be mistaken. I don't get ulcers. I give them!'

"It's my in-tray!"

'His is a working breed.'

"A good employee never stops learning new skills."

'From now on, anyone not found at their desk will be sacked on the spot.'

"Was I too naive and trusting when I agreed to work over the weekend?"

'Sometimes I wonder what would happen to the company if I actually worked!'

"The boss is on a working vacation and we're on a nonworking vacation."

'Sorry - just let me close this deal - then I'm all yours!'

"Such a shame, he was this close to emptying his inbox

'How come your hard days at the office are harder than anyone else's hard days at the office.'

"I'd better get busy. I have a lot of coffee to drink."

"A bright smile every morning- how do you do it?"

'Holidays are for wimps.'

Workaholic's Christmas Party

"I've never seen you work so hard."

'Heaven is a hard adjustment for the workaholics.'