Wordplay Enjoyer Mugs

"Ahh...the beauty of feeling chickens It's an ode. It's a sonnet. It's, it's..." "Sheer poultry in motion."

'It's a simple matter of checks and balances: your waistline has spread and your brain has shrunk.'

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'cats laugh at dog's gaffe.'

"No, no. We want Wateship-down, not smack-down."

'And once again it's ended in a tie.'

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"Staff support"

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

Vlad the Inhaler

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

Lesser known greek gods,

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

Punt Cake

Gay Times...

Wok. Don't Wok.

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

Please Drove Carefully.

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"Out damn Spot

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."