Wine And Chocolate Connoisseur T-Shirts

"May I recommend Deborah, she has a perfect blend of Merlot and chocolate."

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Occu-Pie Mars

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'A cheeky red?'

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'Chocolate milk, carrot cake,candied yams...see, there's a solution to everything!'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

"Now I really hate poetry."

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

Sauvignon Bonk

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Bacchus.

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"To paraprase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure with out pain au chocolat."

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

Can I give you a slice of the action?

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

Leaning Wine Bottle of Pisa

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.