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Next! (liposuction specialist)

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

'I won't tell my thighs if you don't..'

Overeaters anonymous meeting today at 5:00.

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

Woman Weighing Herself on Two Scales.

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe that calories consumed during vacation do not count against your diet.

'Yes I do notice an improvement. Your chins don't juggle anymore.'

'I think dad's getting fitter. I couldn't hear him wheezing until he turned the corner today.'

'Please help mommy lose some weight. She gets grumpy when she's on a diet that's not working.'

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

'I've found the blockage it looks like your gastric band!'

'I knew it was time to do something when I leapt from the stage to do some body surfing and the crowd parted.'

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

"Wow. . . Are you expecting or did you nibble on your gingerbread house again?"

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

''Exercise'? -- But I hate to eat and run!'

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

Woman on running machine next to a cake.

A tailor measuring a large man

Jump-Rope Rhymes For Adults

"My diet book is outselling yours."

"At what point does slow jogging become walking?"

"Ready to head back?"

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

"I can't give enlightenment, only great calves."

'I'm afraid I can't accept that excuse Mrs Hart. It isn't possible to inhale second hand calories.'

'I'm on a diet -- I just eat the brains.'

A mid-lithe crisis.

'Wouldn't it be easier if we just got more heavier friends?'

"Would you like your real size or one that artificially inflates your ego?"

"Well. It DOES make you look thinner."

'It's me or the cake....'

'I AM going to join a gym, but I've got to get in shape first. . .'