Vintage Shop Owner Gifts

"Thanks. It's vintage."

"I wonder what this was for."

"It's not outdated - it's retro."

Downsizing Pushback

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Cocktails on the verandah.

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

Sir Winston Churchill

The Missing Sock Returns

Shoe Shine/Lace Tie

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

Second hand furniture.

'My luck, I buy a bottle of wine from 450 B.C. and it's still five years from reaching maturity.'

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

Military Medals

Barcode on Ancient Greek Vase

Early Piety

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

The original paperless office

Illustration from an Unpublished Novel

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

Early Colour TV

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

'Jerry's 'old school'.'

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

Grandma's caf

Ladies by the seaside

A Footnote - Self Portrait of Beardsley, Bound to the God of Nature

The Young Ladies' Young Gentleman

"How soon will this be a remnant