Vice-principal Pillows

"I'm going through an identity crisis. The principal, vice-principal and all the teachers know me by my real name."

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

"Yeah, I got into trouble, but I think the principal really enjoyed my rendition of 'I Did It My Way.'"

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

'I think the new V. P. of Global Development is here.'

"I guess it took a pandemic to make me realize school is better than trying to learn stuff online."

'Right, who threw that?' (giant pupil in class).

"Tell the vice presidents they've downsized enough."

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

'This test doesn't understand me.'

"He said he doesn't want to see me in his office again..."

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

Big Bang Theory.

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

'One more curse out of you, young man, and it's right down to the principal's office.'

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

'When training my son, keep him totally ignorant. I'm grooming him to be VP in-charge-of -denials.'

"We hardly ever intercept hard copy notes anymore, Stanley."

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

'Let's put it this way Tommy, if we could go below F minus you would be forging new territory!'

"I hope you're not going to let this I.P.O. affect your grades."

'He's normally not affectionate, but he's really taken a liking to you!'

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

'Al, this is Jack. He's with the Committee to Eliminate the Board of Education. Jack, this is Al. He's with the Committee to Increase Funding for the Board of Education.'

'Ms. Blumter, please get me a copy of Educational Leadership for Dummies.'

"I DO have a note from my doctor...but nobody can read it!"