Vermin Vigilantes T-Shirts

It's time to return the humane rat trap.

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

'... and bless all of God's creatures with the possible exception of the greenfly...'

'Well, Mr. 'I don't need any sunblock', what have you got to say for yourself now?'

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

"Peter Parker is Spiderman! Clark Kent is Superman!! Bruce Wayne is Batman!"

Guide to Contagious Diseases.

The new global mantra flag for the future

You can relax now.

"Beware of God"

About 40% of the nation's coronavirus deaths could have been prevented...

Johnson allows the Delta variant to run wild in Britain

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

"Want to score some flu shots.?"

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

Guns won't help

'Drugs' 'Viruses'.

I've got to monitor all chatter in the cafe to prevent future pastry thefts. I don't know … What if you've got a scone thief for a neighbor, or a friend, or even a family member? Sure, today it's just a scone. But the next attack could be huge – the big one! You don't mean … Hoagie. They're trying to destroy our whole way of life.

Anti-Vaxer

Coronavirus dancing around an EU flag

Wrong ways to wear a face mask.

Ebola Clinic

'Well doctor, is it serious?'

'There's a gleam in his eye!'

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. I wish I had emotions like people do. I wish I could think as logically as people do. I'd like to take a walk along the shoreline without rusting. Storing energy in a battery rather than a pot belly would be nice. Having a sense of humor would be fun. The ability to selectively delete memories would be great to have. I wish I didn't have to worry about digital viruses. I wish I didn't have to worry about biological viruses.

Fair readers, please accept these personal tips for remaining healthy and germ free. Public service announcement! Keep your stress low. Exercise, eat right, hydrate and try to get a little affection in your life, if you get my meaning. If you use someone else's computer, wipe down the keyboard with alcohol to kill the germs. Ditto with the mouthpiece of a borrowed cellular phone. Don't touch anything or anyone. Bathe yourself in hand sanitizer. Don't leave the house, and if you do, don't inhale

"Okay, Okay... the vaccine has side effects, but at least social distancing is guaranteed."

"Walter had an attack of road rage in the driveway."

'I'm sorry but I can't bring out the dessert menu until both of you have eaten your veggies, company policy.'

'I don't know what it is. It showed up right after I invented agriculture.'

"I do wish they'd hurry up with that vaccine, so I can get back to worrying about dying of something else."

Swine Flu danger as a pandemic

"Relax, it's not the killer-virus. It's 'Saturday Night Fever' so he'll be 'stayin' alive'."

Keep out - Covid-19