Vatican Aficionados Pillows

Vatican Car Park - Staff Parking Only

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

Dance of the Red (Papal) Shoes.

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

Self raising Lazarus.

Pope Francis

Santa entering a pool for a swim

Pope Francis' visit to America...

'Now that they've got a new Pope, there aren't any openings for old guys.'

'My God - there's two of 'em!'

Ding and Dong.

Santa incorporates therapy into his repertoire.

'It's not so bad. There's only a few rules.'

At home with the Pope.

"No more for him, he has to drive."

Santa '50s' Claus.

Some catholic like it hot

"I'm sure that It's Sicily, Capri, Rome, Genoa and then Barcelona."

The Pope

"Finally - a faith-based initiative I can embrace."

"Sure, we know how to have a good time up here"

Dog Confession

"As long as you're up there, how about brushing the snow off the satellite dish?"

Spectators at a coliseum

The pope.

"Give the little bastards what they want!"

'When they said I couldn't take it with me, I immediately had my halo plated with 24-karat gold.'

Brutus stabbing Caesar an accident

"Fortunately, I was texting St. Christopher."

Pope Tour

Sadie, I keep hearing all this talk about how the president might be literally insane. It's making me feel anxious. Sometimes I wonder if this is how the British felt when King George III went crazy and lost America. Or is it more like how the Romans felt when Caligula made his horse a senator? That reminds me: Did you get to ride Caligula's horse, or were you too old for that? Before I answer that, let me show you what the Romans did to losers in the old days ...

'You should apply - you're good at pontificating!'

Pope Benedict XVI resigns.

Pope Francis

'Do you know brother I think this Papacy 'IS' going to be different.'