U.s. Marshal Mugs

"Seriously? A funny disguise? This is the new witness protection program?"

High security Santa's grotto

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

"Well, I have an opening in Cloverdale Mall ... let me hear you say Ho Ho Ho."

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

Pirates at the mall.

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

Justice

'I've decided I'm going to be a fireman when I grow up.'

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

Hip-hop cops on stage.

The Lawman

"Not guilty"

'That's for false alarms...'

Counsel examining witness

"Let's try the swearing-in process again, and this time, without the high-fives at the end."

"That's right, think of yourself all the time! I'm the one who will be losing a client for the next twenty years."

"Do you swear you haven't embroidered the truth in your testimony today?"

"In a surprising turn of events, the end testifies against the means."

Judge

"Watch yourself Sheriff....Looks like Billy the Kid is back in town!"

"The blaze has taken hold on the eight floor Chief. The C.E.O., V.P. and C.O.O. are trapped in the boardroom!!"

'Oh yeah. He's the fastest in the west alright. The fastest out of town, at the first sight of trouble.'

Count Von Moltke.

"Gee, Marshal, he must have been one of the good guys"

'Wow. The anti-smoking movement really has been successful.'

"Six fact checkers spontaneously combusting in one election cycle? Yeah, I am starting to see a pattern, Higgins."

Barrister pointing out dozing judge to the jury

'...and that M'tud, concludes the case for the prosecution.'

'I feel so much safer with an air marshal on board.'

'Yesterday he was a kingpin, but today he's just a lynchpin.'

"Raise your right hand and swear on the tablet..."

Fire Assembly Point