Tv Fans With A Bookish Twist Gifts

'Illiterati' Isn't Jeffrey Archer Brilliant...

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

Do it yourself books.

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

"Don't open me, you fool!"

Tree Funeral

"BBC One’s Casualty has reached its 1000th episode. The long-running hospital drama is apparently very popular with viewers... But even more popular among jobbing actors."

"Do you think Trump has read 'Contemporary Relativism and the Death of Meaning'?"

"Grandma's TV is so old it wasn't made in a foreign country."

"You don't understand, Mom. Our staying in and watching TV is not the same as you and Dad staying home and watching TV in Dayton, Ohio."

People I've Met At Parties Whose Names I've Forgotten

'Good book?'

''Masterpiece Theater' will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you 'Slushpile Showplace'....'

'I think someone's asking to go out.'

'Santa has been and he's taken our telly...'

Police Box

"There's the remote!"

'Your entire library consists of nothing but tabloids bound in Corinthian leather?'

'Actually, they like to read, but so little is translated into dog.'

'Let's see what's on the war channel...'

Dragon's Den

'You are tuned to the 24 hour Paris Hilton Channel.'

"As I near my 9th life, I feel I’m entering a post-curious, pre-fatalist phase of existence."

The walking dead

"The Seven Warning Signs of Seven Warning Signs"

'Not another Doctor Who spin off!?'

Canadian television trivia.

'Is there a Nobel Prize for viewing?'

'-and to all you night owls out there...'

"He was right. . . He really did have a novel in him."

"I knew it was a mistake to get Katie Price in for a book signing."

"'Game of Thrones' is finished George, get over it."

'Thanks for coming Bob, the reception was terrible before...'

'Tell you what, if you show us how to switch channels, you can join our club.'

'I thought I'd just crease a few book spines while I catch up on my soaps.'