Translation T-Shirts

'I say to hell with it. If it can't be said in English, it ain't worth saying at all.'

'Oh great, this book's in cow.'

To his dismay, Captain Kirk stumbles upon a Vulcan handsign-to-English translation website,

Orator translates in many languages.

'It's the French Government - they want us to return all the words we borrowed from their language.'

Spanish speaking English department

Dog/Cat dictionary.

"I need a cup of Jose."

Campaign for Plain English

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

"Chiminelas caranchita!"

Lost to antiquity.

"Are you sure he's saying 'Death to the infielders'?"

"Send for a Prftgxrgplwtkn interpreter - case adjourned for a thousand light years."

"You Brits really crack me up. Biscuit instead of cookie and lorry instead of van. So tell me, when you just said 'You're fired', what's it mean in American?"

"Jacques, some of us don't care whether 'water' is masculine or feminine."

Translators...

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

Berlitz guide to Scamese

The online language course got off to a good start...

"OK...let's practice your Spanish! And we'll start with things you know...like this! Your computer joystick! In Spanish, it's...it's...el joystick."

Danaelect: 'There wouldn't be so many problems if everyone spoke the same language, so I'm creating one.'

"You your name is Maria Hernandez? What a coincidence! We were supposed to have maria Hernandex come in today for a job interview but she never showed up!"

Bilingual

Book Review Translator

"orfay igPay atinLay, esspray ootway."

"I can handle the 'Gobble,' but you're going to have to find someone else to translate the 'Dygook' part."

"I'm stuck for the 'June-moon' rhyme in Serbo-Croatian."

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

"We don't have knock-knock jokes on Christmas."

"My friend Bernarda fell this morning. But it's okay...it just bruised her poquito."

"'Pobre Pablo! Hoy esta Enfermo.' Can you tell me what I just said, Cruz?"

"Nurse, can you send in the interpreter for Senora Delgado?"

Chiantis In Translation

"The bad news is that we've had to cut most of the services. . . The good news is that we can now tell people in 23 languages what we don't do anymore!"