Trainee Who Loves Laughter T-Shirts

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

"Three more years of high school."

'It's a farton, fartoff lamp!'

'I considered running away, but since I'll probably be living at home until I'm 38, it's a bad career move.'

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'

How was I supposed to know she was under age?

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

Urine Catcher

'I bet he starts with a joke!'

'The doctor will be right with you shortly, he's finishing medical school.'

"Well, I thought I'd give fencing a try, but I sucked at it."

"I'm you, from the future, here to deliver a witty comeback line."

"Of course I love school...but I love no more cafeteria food more."

"My husband finally taught him to use the toilet but can't convince him to give up kitty litter."

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

A bath at Boulogne. - Appalling position of Mr and Mrs Tomkins, who had a jib horse when the tide was coming in.

"He would rather die than salivate!"

'You've definitely mastered it, Richard, but not every song is appropriate for the chicken dance.'

'I stopped watching Sesame Street the second I found out it was educational.'

(Visual gag) Wet T-shirt Competition A group of guys yelling out excitedly to a rack of wet T-shirts

Dog Training For The Ninties

'He says he's training to be a world champion weightlifter - With a knife and fork.'

"Mr. Mullins did say I should stroke you but I didn't think he meant it literally."

"You say you want me to do well in school. I thought you'd be more excited that I can burp the alphabet!"

Grooming: Make sure your pony is securely tied.

'I told him you were an ice cream vendor. You take it from here.'

'Your attention everybody! -- There's a 'severe foot watch' in effect until four o'clock this afternoon.'

'Tom just had his first workout at the gym.'

'My dad says I'm good at training little animals - Sit, boy!'

"And that one I tagged with a flamethrower from ten yards."

Will act like an idiot for food.

"I think they call it a miracle drug because it'll be a miracle if I can get the cap off."