Traditional Role Ponderer Prints

Cleaner

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

'At least I don't have his life.'

"Lord, thank you for guiding me through the whole 'evolution by natural selection' thing."

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

The Male Atom: Sex, Sport, War and Good Intentions.

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

I know time is an earthly construct, but I still feel sleepy in the afternoons.

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

'Our top theologians have studied the issue, Your Majesty, and they agree that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.'

Max Weber

CartoonStock Upload

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

Telling Self to Buzz Off

'Don't try to deny it, Jehovah - we've got witnesses.'

"How long has he been missing?"

Caption Contest TK

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

'Please don't read anything into the fact that I'm wearing loafers. I assure you I'm a very energetic worker.'

That's no big deal, a lot of people get Siskel and Ebert mixed up

'Well, that brings us up to my third birthday...'

Tree of Knowledge/Tree of Evolution

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

Yeah, I woke up as a roach because I was so full of existential dread – Why did you wake up as a dung beetle?

What brings you to therapy, Rudy? Dr. Noodle. I've been feeling like my whole life is on pause. And I can't find the remote to unpause it. Meanwhile, everyone else's stories are proceeding apace. They're all into the second act already. They've all had plot twists, and hero's journeys, and epic love scenes, and thrilling reversals of fortune ... Meanwhile, I'm still paused on the opening credits because no remote. Why don't you get up off the couch and unpause it manually? You can do that?

I see

Evolution of God. . .

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"

The Loneliness of Power

"I'll have whatever they're having."

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'