Town History Buff Gifts

"Good news is we killed the vampire. Bad news is he was actually our beloved town hero, Mosquito Man."

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated.

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

Trump Administration Raising White Flag in Ukraine

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"You're fired."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Gender Equality

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

Great Chinese Dynasties

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

International Women's Day

"What's a patent?"

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

Flags

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

Cocktails on the verandah.

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

Easter Island legs

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'