Tour De France Gifts

Tour de France

La Tour 2007.

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Bringing Your Child To The Bicycle Race

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

Knight in shining Lycra!

'This is the fun part...waiting to find out just what we've ordered.

Bradley Wiggins

"Yes, but this one is made of Chiclets."

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

Man biking with an enormous amount of things on his back.

'I think we have some stowaways.'

That private little woodland walk you used to love now with a: Visitors' Experience Centre!

Ordering Food At A French Restaurant.

Somewhere in France: The Fabric of Daily French Life Is On Display

'What?! Not even one of you wants to see how they're made?'

'Well, they're just like your mom's cookies if your mom is a 35 ton, multi-unit dough extruder.'

'The yeast cells are flocculating? - I don't think the kids are ready for that.'

"Now we're leaving the hall of stuff we stole from other cultures and entering the hall of stuff we paid too much for."

'And here on our left you see the sugary cereal aisle...a real crowd pleaser!'

'Of course he's smiling. In your best high school French, you just ordered Champagne for the entire hotel.'

Let's see...number 61...the painting's name is 'Calamity'.

Whale Watch Tours.

Travel Scenes

"You'd think over the years one or two of them would catch on."

Placier.

A Young Indoor Cyclist

"Howard's gone on the Tour de France without his bicycle again."

"If three coins in the Trevi fountain will work, why not lots?"

"The years 1966 through 1995 are blank because I was on tour with the Grateful Dead."

"Amsterdam? Boy, am I lost!"