Tire Whisperer Pillows

Driver to tire salesman: 'I drive on a lot of rough roads. How much to pave the tires?'

"Enough with the wisecracks. Just send the truck."

'All your tires HAD plenty of air in them.'

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

Touring Cyclist

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

Knit One, Pearl One, Drop One.

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

"Have you seen that sweater that you crocheted for me?"

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

Car Dentistry.

'In her day, she did all the work for me, now I'm doing all the work for her.'

Support groups for car repairs.

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

Psychic Car Mechanics.

Caveman who has just invented the wheel is amazed to see a paper airplane demonstrating the principle of flight.

Philip Nye – cycle chiropractor

'I gave her that ball of yarn...'

"Before we test this, do you know how to fill out an accident report?"

"You spoil that Hamster."

The Gallery Guard Unravelling the Wool of a Jumper on a Painting, Creating a Nude.

'I finnaly located what was causing that hissing sound on the tractor.'

Granny Wear

"This obsession of yours about becoming a car mechanic..."

Psychic car mechanics.

"Don't worry Doctor. We expect your car to make a full recovery."

When did you last have your oil changed?

"It's worse than I thought."

"That metallic grinding means her throwout bearings are shot. She's backfiring through her carburetor. The tick indicates transmission trouble, and the smoke means she's on fire."

'I wanted a little more speed. I just hope I'm not violating any laws by using a jet engine.'

'I'm knitting you sweater... do you want it too big or too small?'

'Bad news, Dr. Treemont...It needs an engine transplant.'