Theoretical Discussions Gifts

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

Yound Einstein disproves an early theory: 'Aha! A watched pot DOES boil!'

Denmark scrapped anti-blasphemy law!

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

"Do you think the flat earth society has members round the globe?"

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

Sport: Crisis in the Real Madrid.

"No es problema para mi si no es problema para ti."

"Now that was post-modern sex."

"So, what are you reading?"

"I have good news and bad news about your cat, Dr Schrodinger..."

"Discussion topic: Is our society becoming less civil and more violent?"

'What do you mean 'theoretically'? Everything we do is theoretical.'

'You present a very convincing argument.'

"Mine's bigger than yours."

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

"The problem is you say Nietzsche and expect everything to be just peachy."

Spelling a newspaper

'To avoid possible schism, a period of careful reflection is needed before changing the light-bulb.'

'A little squirt like Graubart would theorize that the Universe is contracting!'

"All in all, I'd say it's a pretty convincing explication of chaos theory."

"He's Right Behind Me, Isn't He?"

"I don'y know about you guys, but I don't feel like I've lost one goddamn bit of my feminity."