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The Family Inactive - Couch Potatoes/Rug Spuds.

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

TV-Man

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

'Someday TVs will be in big boxes on the floor.'

"I find that hugely offensive!"

TV jester.

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

Big screen TV.

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

'Poll results are in...90% of Americans can't spell Schwarzenneger.'

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

"It's wonderful to be away from the rat race. So, what happened on 'CSI: Miami' last night?"

What are you in the mood to get confused watching tonight?

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

"Which news channel should we watch?"

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

'I'll sure be glad when somebody invents cable!'

"Would you like to sleep through the film or the variety show?"

"I now pronounce you man and couch."

"You really need to think about getting glasses."