Teen Empowerment Pillows

Girl to mother: 'Don't call me a teenager. From now on, I want to be referred to as a pre-adult.'

'By the time we grow up we'll have complete equality with men...Ulcers, high blood pressure,heart attacks...'

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

"He's gone goth"

'You know they've reached puberty when they're more interested in Dr. Ruth than Babe Ruth.'

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

PROBLEM AREAS

'This is a good time to be young, son. Look at all the opportunities you have in front of you...you can help sole the problems of the environment, poverty,civil rights....'

'I think there was a typo in the lab instructions.'

"I've tracked our GPS coordinates over the past week dad. Well, we're roaming the plains alright!"

"This is crazy! We've been here only 10 minutes, we've spent all our money, and we've got nothing to show for it!"

Do you ever wonder if there's really a higher power? What do you mean? Is there an all-knowing being that keeps track of you? That always knows where you are

'He's at a very impressionable age.'

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

What are you looking for in a college? A strong environmental program. Ok. Pick 4 or 5 we could visit. I've got 3 days for the trip. There's one in Ohio. Can do. One in Maine, Iowa and California. You need a good geography program. Here's another one. Where's St. Paul?

Welcome to your new English Class.

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

The 5 paragraph essay is sooo stupid. Why do we have to learn it? So you can get good SAT scores. That will get you into a good college, and then a good job. So you never have to write another 5-paragraph essay again.

"Another barnacle?!" "I was a teenage creature."

'Don't forget to put gas in the car and the mower.'

'This book thing, Mum, where do I plug it in?'

Mentoring Unit: 'Go on! You can do it! You can be a mentor!'

"Hey, look - Mom left us an internal memo."

The tulip knew it was in trouble when called by its scientific name.

Funny Farm

'I wouldn't worry too much about his communication skills....grunting is perfectly normal at his age!'

Mrs. Tree? A hockey ball hit your daughter. It's likely just a bad bruise. Whew! Though there could be a fracture, nerve damage or fatal blood clots. What? Don't worry. Our medical advisor is evaluating Twig right now. Can you sign this liability waiver? Her hand seems fine. Team lawyer.

"I can't believe this! All these filthy messages on your cell phone! And so many of them! What is it? 100? 500? 1,000?"

'How did our summer vacation turn intoa summer job??'

"Stop smirking, it's just an expression! You know perfectly well what I mean when I say I'm putting my foot down and you can't go out tonight!"

The Awful Lawfuls Chapter 4

'What does the word ‘Face' mean in this sentence: 'He was only trying to save face.' A) The front of the head. B)To look at something. C) The surface of a solid. D) Dignity.

"Cool game!"

Potential Into Kinetic Energy Conversion Method #18

Is it true kids your age lie 14 times a day? That's outrageous! Yeah, mom. It's sooo off. Good to hear! 14 seems high to me. 8 sounds right.