Techniques T-Shirts

"Damn it, I still haven't got you right! Let's try again."

Jack of all trades

The Computer Bore

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

'Your shoe's untied.'

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

Early cyborg.

The Not-So Smart Meter

Candid Camera store.

STRIP Hambone: Fix it yourself

Dog tricks. 'He's doing it right now. Dudley dreams in Technocolor!'

Congratulations on your retirement!

"What other tricks does he need?"

"Nice try, but I know a squirrel in a bird suit when I see one."

'It's O.K. Charlie - you can relax. The T.V. repairman said, 'it can be fixed!''

"And this is one of our most poular models..."

High speed cinder block

STRIP Hambone: Early diesel run computer

Battery Lighthouse

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

Man mourns the loss of his king after being checkmated.

'Imagine if it was this simple to upgrade our staff.'

'Warning: Use of oversized apertures or antennas will void warranty,'

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

'God?' Earth receives its first transmission from space.

'What's the concept? I'm not sure what you're trying to say, Ms. Harris.'

'But I don't want to be able to turn on the toaster with the TV remote!'

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

Fixing the TV.