Tech-witty T-Shirts

I'm sorry. This is technical support. Personnel is extension 555.

"Google car."

"He's taught himself work-life balance."

Olivia just hacked into the boy scouts' site and sold them 30,000 boxes of cookies.

Evolution.

'Can our software do that?'

"Where's the business end of this thing?"

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

e-shoes

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'Help! I'm wired and I can't get up!'

'Calling Tech Support does NOT count as one of my wishes!'

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

Weird things I do because of the internet

"Mum! - T.S. Eliot - 'Humankind cannot bear much reality'."

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Your Work/Life Balance Is Off. Shall I Auto-Correct?

"Whoever made Keir Starmer did a sound professional job."

Relaxing in the Sun

'When I took this job, I had no idea how much it would cut into my quality, family texting time.'

'I'm designing a robot that'll do my drafting homework for me,'

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

Man doing a search on a computer

"Sorry, but I don't know how to tie a Reef Knot. Give me a simple project, like building a computer."

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

"I accidentally hit 3 keys and then hit enter. CTRL + Z didn't get rid of it. Can we keep it as a pet?"

"I'm trying to create a hologram of myself. If I'm successful, I'll never have to attend school, go to the dentist or go anywhere else that's boring again."

If Disney was a software company

Why do you need so many computers?

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

'I wrote a software program and sold it for two million dollars.'

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."