
"And do please remember to visit our online confession service."
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"And do please remember to visit our online confession service."
"For your penance, text me 400 Hail Marys."
'Click on the icon.'
'Glory be! Father Ignatius has been enabled.'
'Please enter your sin, followed by the pound sign.'
'He googles you. That's how God knows everything about you.'
Jesus Saves
'For more details or to comment, please visit my faithbook page.'
"This model is great. It monitors my heart rate, vitals and counts my blessings."
God's Phone
"Does the ark have wifi?"
"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"
"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."
"So no bases are uncovered, Sister Ann gives the sermon to the deaf and Brother Brooks blogs it."
Follow God On Twitter
'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'
"Virtual Reality glasses. Well, I said my sermon would let them see the real difference between Heaven and Hell this morning"
"They say it's the first sign of aging - not being able to keep up with new technology."
Priest's computer screen reads: 'e-confession. Please type 10 Hail Marys ... and no cut'n'paste ...'
'Today's sermon may seem a little incoherent -- my 'Preach-o-Mat' program crashed.'
"Please select hymn number 637 on your i-pods."
"You may need to pep up your sermons, sir. Some of the members are requesting WIFI in the pews."
Why god isn't listening...
"Sorry, but the Wi-Fi password is for tithing church members only."
"Let me see if I can get Him on speakerphone."
"I have sent you all an e-mail of today's text if you wish to follow along."
Church Sign Asks If You Are Prepared for Digital Conversion.
'If your guru business is slow, do what I did. Get a professional website presence on the Internet. That's how you found me, right?'
RunningBear@Arrowhead.com.
'We'll put our horses in 'Do Not Track' mode by going through this stream bed.'
'You didn't hear me say my prayers because I texted them.'
"I like this place. You can charge your phone AND save the rainforest."
"I'm your guardian angel. But due to some technical glitz, I happen not to be invisible!"
'It will be nice to have the words of my sermon there but it could be distracting to run football scores ... '
'Well, he's back from tech support.'
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