Taxation Truth Finder Prints

Giving with one hand... taking away with the other.

'Which scares you most - Iran, North Korea, or the alternative minimum tax?'

'He's trying to persuade the Inland Revenue that it's a tax haven.'

'Then he smiled and his very last words were 'Now the inland revenue will never find out!''

'I'm not experienced, but I have a PhD in Byzantine history.'

Monster under the bed.

"It's hard to deal with because it keeps mutating... not the virus... tax law!"

'Professor Blaupunkt's research, funded by the I.R.S., is to find any signs of taxes on other planets.'

'It only made sense for us to finally merge.'

'...and then you smile and say...all together now...'that's not deductible.'.'

'Maybe we can rob Peter AND Paul.'

"What happens to our soul if we're taxed out of existence."

"He's ready for you now. Don't forget to ask for the job at the end of the interview."

'You won't have me as a deduction anymore.'

"Have I met my deductible yet?"

Uncle Sam.

"I've never objected to paying tax... as long as it's other people paying."

'Continuing to deficit spend during a budget crunch is what makes America great!'

'I just had a terrible thought. What if we run out of things to tax in our lifetime.'

'I can't play -- I'm being audited.'

"When you said meet me at your workplace, I assumed you had an office!"

'Ethelred - What we're offering is the chance to consolidate all your Danegeld payments into one manageable lump sum.'

"We take a very dim view of these kind of tax evasion tactics, Mr. Jones!"

"I'm a surrogate birth mother for hire. How do I claim my income?"

Tax Loopty Loopholes

'Uh oh. Here comes the eternal revenue... I hope your taxes are in order.'

Zero rated for VAT.

'I can't tell him you're not here, nitwit, your silhouetted on the window!'

Dear Sir, We have misused all of the money that you sent us and we need you to send us more. Thank you, Internal Revenue

Tax Man Deducts A Witch's Broom As A Travel Expense

Accounting department: Taxable income/Deferred Income/Loophole Research and Development.

'Your money? -- does it or does it not have 'United States Treasury' printed on it?'