Tax Adviser T-Shirts

'Now that's scary!'

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

"Rapunzel,Rapunzel.Throw down your accounts for the last fiscal year!"

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

"It's what we agreed. I'd do the tax avoidance you'd do the tax evasion."

"To tell the truth it's not a quality we look for in an offshore tax adviser."

'I'm sorry, I give advice on spiritual matters, not taxes.'

'Did he have to report it to the IRS every time he touched something?'

What do you mean, use the office as home?

'I phoned the fire station and they just laughed and hung up.'

'Tax evasion options are rather limited under PAYE.'

Romney: 'Corporations are people! We just pay a lot less taxes than you!'

Misunderstood Tax Adviser: Please Leave a Gift.

"...And although they say you can't take it with you, you can if you change it into travellers cheques!"

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

'Progress of a bookshelf'

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

'Forget the DaVinci Code! I'm still trying to crack the tax code!'

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

'There's more to life than winning. There's also losing - to offset taxable capital gains.'

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

The Current Separation of Church and State Explained.

"Just remember if we don't enjoy it we can claim it as a tax-deductible business meeting..."

"I'm as progressive as they come, except for my money. No one touches my money."

The transparent safe box of Panama

Flat tax - equal burden?

"You have to declare what you rob from the rich, but you can deduct what you give to the poor."