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Miracle Mom #5,293

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'Will you pipe down? I'm in a business meeting.'

"How do you do it, hon? Marriage, kids, civic responsibilities, managing a multi-million dollar business and still finding time to do an 18-month stretch for securities fraud?"

Supermom.

Doris K. Elston: Brain Surgeon, Professional Model, Artist, Lawyer....Plus Mother of Four.

'You'll never believe the day I've had...'

Balancing work and family

"First break since 2008."

"Your resume says that you've got your Ph.D., your M.B.A. and that you've worked as a C.F.O. and C.E.O. but that your most important title and position has been M.O.M.?"

"I had to skip my workout."

"I noticed that since I've been working at home you've been paying me hazard pay. How did you know?"

Hassled Mother.

"Let me put on my 'working' head."

'How soon can I return to work? About fifteen minutes ago.'

'Three kids, full-time job, night classes and coaches a girls basketball team. She's stretched a little thin.'

Luggage Mom

'This home based business is easy to set up. Everyone knows that women are better at multitasking.'

'I home-schooled all seven kids. Right now I'm in the teacher's lounge.'

"And THAT was just the weekend!"

"This one's for volunteering for field trips. This one's for planning the class holiday parties. . ."

"You're fatigued, run down, anxious, with high blood pressure, back ache, and a general malaise. You've got kids."

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after 3 children all day"

Having It All

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

'My mom is really important in our house. She's the cook, housekeeper, nanny, lanundress and the boss.'

"You got custody of us, mommy, because you're the very best attorney picker."

"The Momfia"

"Noah, I'm tired of doing battle with you!"

Working mother

"Your mom's a very special person."

Housewife with her toddler hooked on the end of the mop.

Mother with baby and puppy in a sling and her husband in the buggy.

"Kosovo, Iraq, Afghanistan...Sarge Higgins is one hell of a tough guy! But he wouldn't have a chance against my mom - she raised three kids!"

"Among them, my children have eighteen years of accumulated experience harassing their mother!"