Sundial Enthusiast Pillows

'If you ask me the time again, I'll punch you!'

'See, I told you it's time for sex!'

"It's running five minutes fast."

Fly Football

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'Do you think that's wise?'

Football Chameleon

The trauma of losing.

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

Sundial Time

Mohamed Salah

'Oi, nobody gives me a kiss.'

'I got a reverse hat trick. I let three goals in.'

Ascent of man from ape to beer swilling football lout.

Watching the football.

We encourage the playing of games with other children.

Football

Men can show their emotions!

"We've got the same ringtone!" (Two guys opening ring pull drinks cans).

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

"And the way you kids kick ass today will speak volumes about the leaders of tomorrow you will be."

Teenage Angst.

Football player taking the ball home.

Footballer with a broken leg and a ball in his cast.

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

Thibaut Nicolas Marc Courtois

Game time.

'He's definitely heading for a red card.'

The Birth of Soccer

Footballer kicking his own brain.

Football heads...

'How's the football?' 'Terrific. The coach says I'm one of the school's greatest drawbacks.'

A scarecrow goalie