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Management of Change

'It's simple. First we look at the upside. Then we look at the downside. Then we look at the upside-down side.'

"I recommend our 'wild' expectations be downgraded to 'great.'"

'No wonder the company is in trouble!'

'...your hindsight on this project was far more accurate than his foresight.'

"So...this is how we set sales goals."

"We need to develop a long term strategy to achieve consistent quick fixes."

"Help! I'm surrounded by idiots."

Vikings behind you, a scary monster to the side...

"Remember, a journey of a thousand miles begins with either two squares forward and one to the side, or two squares to the side and one forward."

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"Before we decide that TV is dead, can someone tell what digital marketing is?"

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

'As chairman, that's my opinion. I propose we table any motion to further discuss this matter. All those in favor say 'aye'. All those opposed say 'bye'.'

'We need to do a better job at whatever it is that we do.'

Team Experiences Cabinet: Productivity, Fun, Goal Setting!

SWOTs

"I don't know if it's truly a zero sum game, but our game sure summed to zero."

"We thought we'd put in the details later."

"Things are getting desperate...we have to do something!"

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

A successful meeting! Only one member left in a rage shouting obcenities.

'Or, we could take that anger and do something productive.'

"We need to give this enough time for it to prove me right."

"I think you need a backup strategy in case 'waiting from my competitors to go out of business' doesn't work."

"Give them what they want? Don't be an idiot. We'll make them want what we give."

'The details of the company's new management plan are being worked out.'

"Now if that isn't a metaphor for life I don't know what is."

"Well the GOOD news is that if we carry on like this there's a SMALL chance we'll be making a profit in less than 4587 years!"

'We've just become the biggest corporation in America.. let's celebrate today and begin downsizing tomorrow.'

"If money gets too expensive to borrow, our fall-back is this company GoFundMe page."

"We have a problem. It's called the competition."

Cantor Buried Tale

'CPA's' evolving into 'Consultants'

"You mean what we did just then was an actual war?"