Storytime T-Shirts

'Freddie, the Little Merger Mogul, didn't expect to have a monopoly right away...'

"Can you read me a bedtime story about ponies, next time?"

''...And the Prince and Princess lived happily ever after, but elsewhere, fighting continued.''

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

'Because he was the one who had to milk her. That's why Jack traded the cow for a handful of beans.'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Swan Fairy Tales

"Just let her believe in fairies a little while longer."

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

Little Princess.

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

Birds reading over woman's shoulder

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

Church Library - Pop-Up Books

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

Biggles has a more staid adventure.

'Hurray for indoor plumbing!'

'And you're telling me this, why?'

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

"Go figure: nobody wanted to kiss me when I was an ugly prince, but now, somehow, pretty girls are lining up!"

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

"Mommy usually reads me a story, then slips me a twenty."

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

'Come on, girl! I know you can do it! Jump over the moon!'

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

'It doesn't say what she had for dessert on Thanksgiving. It just says she made a coach out of her pumpkin.'

"What you find 'boring' spies from all over the world would find extremely interesting."

Bedtime in Ancient Greece

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'