Station Staff Pillows

'We deeply regret to have to inform you that no train will be late today. You even have the chance to get a clean seat. Please accept our apologies. Thank you for your understanding.'

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

Multi-tasking.

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

'These are job perks.'

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

TSA Noah

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

The World's Easiest Airport

'Say, our stress control seminar worked! Our sales are way down...but so what if they are.'

'Due to cutbacks, he lost his company vehicle, so he has to improvise.'

'The ultimate sign of success is when no one puts you on hold.'

Stressed employee says to colleague: 'I think I'm on top of the situation and I hope I'm in the loop, but I can't seem to get ahead of the curve.'

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

'Need I remind you who's boss here?'

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'He's finally done it - kicked breakfast TV!'

Busy office.

Employee of the Month Parking

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

"Sorry, you're only allowed one carrion."

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

'Normally, I would give credit where credit is due but we're in a credit crunch. Therefore, I will take all the credit for your hard work on this project.'

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

The role of administration.

Brainstorm in progress.

'I'm afraid I can't take you to my leader without a prior appointment.'

"I intend to stay in this job, come Hell or high water."

Sales.

'Look Jefferson, much as I respect your emphasis of the informal approach...'