Starting A Travel Job Mugs

"And to all of you who swore you'd never fly this airline again - welcome back."

"Err Stewardess? Do you have a sweet? I think my ears are about to pop."

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

A private jet takes off

'You're off the plane, Hal. Put the laptop on your desk.'

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

'He must be going economy!'

"Since when isn’t a taxidermied animal a comfort pet?" "Since forever!" "Dang it!"

'I'm just here on a lay-over.'

"Today we can help herd cattle, go on a nature hike, get a sauna and massage, or go into town and rob the bank."

A Simplified Map Airport Map

"Not only is our flight delayed, but the airline has declared bankruptcy."

"Excuse me... I think you're in my seat."

'We'd like to start by boarding anyone with hot food they've been waiting to eat on the plane.'

"I'd like to be the first to welcome you to our company. But, I've decided not to hire you."

"This is the main house, plus there's a cottage on the property where your Lyft driver would live."

'If God had meant us to fly, he would have made airline seats big enough to sit in.'

"Don't worry dude, that's not the intercom, here, give me the manual."

"Stay together and follow my finger."

"Gosh, you look familiar. Have we flown together?"

Wet Nursing Air Stewardess

Departure/Arrival

'I can book your reservations now. I'm checking listings for airline arrivals...departures...bankruptcies...'

"Honey, I'm home. Anything new?"

"You're so lucky – I can never sleep on planes."

'Airport Check in' "Groping or non-groping"

'I like to relax before my business flights.'

Arrivals Departures Bankruptcies

Seasoned Traveler

Beverage Service "Distancing"

"...and over there, are the foothills of Misery Mountain."

"I understand he's here on a business trip."

"Going camping?"

"...And then we thought 'why waste all that money on planes'?"