Sports Rulebook Nerd Prints

They threw her out of the hopscotch game for unnecessary roughness.

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

Dr Ed Henderson demonstrates that it IS possible for someone to become too familiar with the safety rules.

'Just think of one of these as enabling legislation for the golden rule.'

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

"Mam? What's love juice?"

'Well, I can't find anything in the rule book about it.'

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

At last he had found the Regulatory Guidelines.

'There really is no need for confusion. Rule 10, section 5, article a, subsection 3, exception 4 quite clearly states ... '

'We could have a problem here lads.'

'Stan, wait!... Wrong game!'

"It may not be a balk, but it's something."

'Well, you're right, you're not touching the ball with your hands, so the Ref can't penalize you...'

'Oh for Pete's sake. This ain't nuclear science, gentlemen. I'll read it one more time, but pay attention... 'the infield fly rule is in effect if there is less than two outs and runners on first and second'...'

Sometimes it takes me a little while to adjust!

'Upon further review, the ruling on the field is upheld. The catch was totally constitutional. Touchdown!'

Guest Houses.

'That does it... Now I'm definitely going to become a lawyer.'

'Hey Frank! I've told you before that there is no cross checking in chess.'

Penalty! Fifteen yards for a block in the back.

'Oh, that place...? we shut that down AGES ago!'

'Have you hammered out the new rule book yet?'

"He's got whistleblower written all over him."

'...And that's why, in table tennis. We don't jump the net.'

Football foul (red card).

'Great, you can start Monday.. remember, NO BLUE JEANS.'

'... 'Pickoff'?... No... 'Ground out'? ... No...'

Spring Training Camp. Have you ever thrown spitballs? Not since the league started testing saliva.

Being a stickler for rules, Howard refuses to act until his motion has been seconded.

"I pulled my mask down for five seconds to sip coffee."

'Remember, no hitting below the belt.'

'Excuse me, sirs, I think the penalty is enforced from the succeeding spot.'

'Just a reminder, gentlemen. It's 4 downs today, not 5.'

'All dogs must be on leashes.'