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'Just to make it crystal clear, I am holier than thou.'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

"An everything Martini, please."

Nun Fight.

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

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'What happened to your hand.'

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

Angry wife: 'Oh well DONE Keith! Why didn't you tell me the invite said BRING your own spirits?!'

"Redcoat is down! Repeat, redcoat is down!"

Pope Benedict 16th.

"You're right! It is a mezuzah!"

Credulity, Superstition and Fanaticism.

Honk if you're holy.

The Angel's Share

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

They're missing a few commandments.

Got god? (no you don't...He's got you!)

"Hallelujah!"

'What would you say if I told you there's a way to fit all of that on just one tablet?'

"Lately, I've become more spiritual, and less religious."

Ye Olde Inn, Fine Food & Spirits.

'A cure for a hangover is don't sober up.'

'It's a taste I think I can say I've acquired.'

'That was so funny. I haven't booed that loudly in years.'

Need Cash for Alcohol Research.

"In heaven there are no trees."

"I guess ten is enough."

'Your late husband requests a status up date on how his stocks are doing...'

"Hold up - I have to read the legal disclaimer."

'I've been told to keep my spirits up.'

'I don't care what she'sez. I only dring t'get to the worm.'

"Reverend your sermon was divine, naturally."

Church of divine healing - Emergency Room.

Hell's Bells Whisky