Space Tourism Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"We came to your planet because there are just not enough pickleball courts on our planet."

'Teenagers!'

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

"This year we decided to vacation on the 3rd rock."

An astronaut fishes in volcanoes on another planet.

Martha Stewart Takes Over The Universe

"Sorry...but until we fix the cloaking device, this will have to do."

'Dang, again we're going so fast that we caused a disruption in the time-space continuum.'

Blue Origin

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

"What are you kids going to be for Halloween?"

"I've had it with the helmet mandates."

NASA Special

"Going to Mars sounded like fun. Do you think we can get dad to finance it?"

"Possible exception to Prince William's proposed halt on space travel." proposed halt on space travel."

'Great job Zork, we're lost... you couldn't find Uranus with both hands and a flashlight!'

'Nothing like a Romantic stroll in Saturn's acid rain.'

"Welcome to Mars. We assume you're all up to date on your vaccinations?"

'Sorry, I'm a stranger here myself.'

"AS a matter of fact, yes, you have told me you vacationed on Earth."

"You are here"

"I told you to go before we left Aldebaran!"

'I'm just here on a lay-over.'

Intergalactic travel! Chapter 17: Taking the kids along! (ARE WE THERE YET?)

"So much for finding intelligent life on this planet."

Moon Souvenirs

"I'm infectious."

"How can you claim to offer directions if you don't know the best way to Epsilon Delta VII?"

'The little twerps have me all discombobulated -- I was supposed to start an ice age 100 years ago!'

"Just our luck. We finalyy conquer space travel only to be consumed by a wormhole."

Science Journal. Editor. Ernie, we need a headline that will interest the general public in our artificial supernovas. "Big stars involved in nasty breakups"!

Well, those election results certainly surprised me. Me too, little buddy. But that's because when I went to sleep last night, I had a dream … that Robert F. Kennedy had lived, he appointed Carl Sagan as science advisor and head of NASA, Sagan took us to Mars in 1991, and Donald Trump spent the rest of his days founding casinos and selling real estate degrees on the red planet. Meanwhile, in the 2016 election, Martin Luther King Jr. narrowly defeated Sonny Bono. I just meant I'd forgotten we wer

'Excuse me, do you know any aliens who do landscaping?'

'I'm sorry but I need my own space.'

"What's so galling is that you don't even realize how Earthist you are."