Software Savant Prints

'You sure you've got Photoshop experiance.'

'Rather than learning how to solve that, shouldn't I be learning how to operate software that can solve that?'

Mammon Industries - "He says his name is Billy and he's here to update our software."

'You'll have to excuse my date. He's still in beta.'

'I wrote a software program and sold it for two million dollars.'

Where was I?

'Computers' 'Hardware' 'Software'

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

The Computer takes a drinks break.

"Tech may be shaking things up a bit but I don't see technology as a threat..."

'He's a media consultant. He came with the multimedia software package.'

"I recently upgraded my resume-writing software."

"I remember when your father used to sit me on his lap and look at me like that."

Bill Gates

"You are going to pay for stealing my text editor! You have my Word!"

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

I did it my way.

'It seems to work, I couldn't afford a blackberry!'

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

'Okay, okay, be patient!'

'Can I download that as a PDF?'

All the apps hidden within a phone

'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'

Despite the economic downturn, sales are as good as ever.

Latest Greatest Fastest Computer...versus Good Enough.

'He's an attorney. He came with the software package, to verify software licensing compliance.'

'Sell South Africa!'

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

Rudy, I've noticed your upsells have fallen drastically over the last 16 years. More and more, you just give customers what they ask for instead of pushing them to buy a larger cup, an extra cookie, or a 3-minute bathroom pass. That is unacceptable. So I've signed you up for my mandatory "How to Upsell" course and ordered you the reading material. Tuition fees will be deducted from your check. As your first lesson, I've upgraded you from the 2-week course to the 15-day one for just $50 extra. Ve

"Of course it's only prediction, we can't guarantee anything."

"Wait...... I'm in the bathroom for one minute and you answer my wife's 'Where are you' text with..... 'I'm in a bar with Pete, checking out chicks, foxes and a cute little beaver'??"

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'