Social Studies Teacher Pillows

'I used to have serfs, but I've found that free-range peasants are more efficient.'

"My goodness, if I'd known how badly you wanted democracy I'd have given it to you ages ago."

Statue of liberty wearing a plaster

'Sire, the peasants say you're just using them.'

Not many votes here.

"My third period class has to be mentioned in here somewhere."

"You want democracy? - Have you heard the news from America lately?"

Social studies.

New Immigration Policy of the United States

"You're living in a dictatorship!"

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"The hyenas started it."

'Wentworth Street, Whitechapel'

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

"I used to be your old school teacher, I always said you would amount to nothing."

"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"

"When I get to Heaven, will I still have to clean my room?"

"It turns out you can 'take it with you' if you pack correctly."

'Wow! It didn't take long to lose that new ark smell.'

If Dr. Chan has a schoolteacher husband, a diabetic mother-in-law, twins in preschool, and a daughter who stays with her father across town on alternate weekends, and one twin and the daughter have colds, how many free rapid COVID tests are required to alleviate Dr. Chan's breaking-point levels of despair?

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

Math Teacher

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

"Mom, can you come get me?"

"But you can eat as much as you want from the tree of bullshit."

'It won't do you any good! You can't run from your math problems!'

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

'These sure rule out a lot of options....'

"The school year is officially over, and the teachers won."

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

Thomas Cranmer

"Mum, Mum, the teacher has included some especially tricky choreography just for me in the school musical..."

"I'm a social scientist, Michael. That means I can't explain electricity or anything like that, but if you ever want to know about people I'm your man."

'Division is just like addition except you have to use a different button on the calculator.'