Slice Master Mugs

For Greg, it was just another predictable day at Kraft,

"Nasty slice you have but now we're on this course, we may as well switch to it."

I told you I got us the best table in the house. Pizza.

"I've made a list of lists we need to make."

'Bob likes to express himself through his art!'

'And now over to Mike for the video presentation...Mike?...Mike?'

The first rule of mime club is: You Do Not Talk About Mime Club!

Then I rapidly add cream and butter to the sauce. Ah, get rich quick!

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

"Could you hold off clipping your coupons until I've finished reading the paper?"

'We'd like one pizza cut into eleven pieces.'

"I don't think I could fit another slice in...oh, hold on."

Pizza Fencing

'You'd better cut it into six pieces I don't think I could eat eight!'

"Of course I know what the rearview mirror is for...to check at any moment if my hair still looks ok."

"For goodness sakes, Harold. Stop preening!"

"Hey, that's your personal pan pizza. NO SHARING!"

'He's an experienced golfer! Experienced in sand traps, water hazards and slicing.'

"Hey Mundo, I'm collecting videotape for American's Dumbest Videos! Show me something stupid!"

Protesting Pineapple Pizza

Out Of My Way, Stupid!

'It's commendable that you only ate one slice of pizza, but when you're only cutting it in half...'

Sculptor - "Try not to blink."

'He's an experienced golfer! Experienced in sand traps, water hazards and slicing.'

Man looking in mirror at the barber's.

"If you want feedback from the boss, turn up your volume and stand closer to him."

This place says they have the biggest pizza slice in town...

'On second thought Mr. Akimoto, perhaps we can give you a loan to open a karate club.'

'I like to think of myself as Tiger Woods' greatest nightmare - although I'd don't know why he'd ever dream about me.'

Common golf Problems: 'Worst slice I have ever seen!'

"He doesn't speak English. Act out for him that he should take 2 pills and 3 pills alternate days for nine days, and then he should come back here."

'This PowerPoint slide has a dynamic layout comparing reading scores throughout the district, which you would have seen if I remembered to bring a spare projection bulb.'

"If you're so enlightened, how come you can't lick that slice?"

'We need to work on that slice of yours.'

"We'll slice through this area here, then divide it into sections."