Sleep Story Enthusiast Pillows

'Of course I'm confused, I keep dreaming I'm an insomniac.'

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"I think I need an extra pillow."

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

Wordplay: Hibernation.

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"Why didn't one of the bears just call 9-1-1 and have that girl arrested for trespassing?"

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

'The pioneers opened the frontier, but it wasn't legal until brave lawyers blazed the paper trail!'

"I'll get up in negative five minutes."

"I'm down to only one nap a day. From 8 am t0 8 pm."

A breakthrough in the morning meeting

Contented man and cat sleeping

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

"Is the Itsy Bitsy Spider obsessive-compulsive?"

'I hate counting sheep. I get enough math at school.'

Do not disturb...

'Don't take this the wrong way, Honey, but not only have I decided to hibernate this year, but I want to hibernate in the spare room...'

'Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!'

Baby zipping himself up then going to sleep

"I only drink decaf, otherwise I'm awake up to four hours a day."

"I like to come prepared for meetings."

'It's not Spring yet! Go back to sleep!'

"You were snoring."

"What's with your hair?"

"Let's go to sleep so that when we wake up today will be tomorrow."